
You’ve seen it before but never in morning:
the pink tinged ridge, a canyon in dawning,
a river of pulse beneath it,
alive even as she dies in her dreaming, alive
and seemingly speaking. Listen.
This is the story not categorized, alphabetized,
the title you’ll never see alongside Broken
Mickey Mouse Ring, Age 5, or Bicycle Accident,
Second Grade, this is the uncharted waters
of her and you try to imagine it, the way
it tells you in that still-girl voice,
I didn’t think I had a choice, and you can see it:
that rage red stain; in truth,
you could always see it
reflected in her eyes, her silence and you know
how later is, that now you’ll start to see
it in every black winged fledgling girl
in every curb shadow and you’ll be thinking
my god, who touched her, who made her
hide in a corner, pick up a razor,
how thick was the boulder they rolled
before her, that they never heard her words?
My God, you think, this beautiful day
almost never happened at all and all
you really want is to stop thinking about it,
to start the morning over, somewhere else
on that landscape of her, all you really want
is the person you think she is,
without all the yesterdays and you know
how yesterday is, that haunting voice never shuts up
unless your hand is over it,
so you grasp her wrist, awaken her
with a kiss, but you cannot forget
the river that turns, burns beneath your fingers,
silent but alive. Oh, still so alive.
*IBPC 3rd place, Nov. 2004
Susan Culver lives in Colorado and is the editor of Lily. Her poetry and short fiction have appeared in a number of publications, including The Pedestal, Tryst and PoetrySuperHighway.
